thaibrator:

hey now 

ur a rockstar

get your

gendertier:

gendertier:

gendertier:

i jUST WALKED INTO MY MOMS ROOM AND THERE’S A DACHSHUND IN HERE

WE DON’T OWN A DACHSHUND???? 

????????

okay this dog is so sweet but where is my mom omfg

theoncomingstormofgallifrey:

such-a-retardis:

catswithbenefits:

why ride a rollercoaster when you can ride me 

Because rollercoasters can actually make me scream.

exit the womb they said

life will be great they said

i feel bad for nice sharks because no matter how nice they are everyone screams and swims away scared shitless like maybe that shark just wanted to braid hairs and talk about celebs

laughingnancy:

IS IT A FRIEND CRUSH 

OR IS IT A REAL CRUSH

thesociallyawkwardasian:

‘please dont be gay porn’ i whisper as i scroll down tumblr in public

meladoodle:

sexydanhowell:

meladoodle:

A police dog searches you for weed and pulls it out of your back pocket.. you think ‘fuck’ and start planning your excuse until the dog starts lighting a blunt, gives you a wink and says ‘yo thanks dude’

What?

A police dog searches you for weed and pulls it out of your back pocket.. you think ‘fuck’ and start planning your excuse until the dog starts lighting a blunt, gives you a wink and says ‘yo thanks dude’